I have been an optimizer since long before I ever knew there was a word for it.
Capsule wardrobes had me immediately. Not in an aspirational Pinterest way, but in a deeply obsessed, slightly alarming way. Who remembers Kim Johnson Gross's Chic Simple books? Fewer choices. Fewer regrets. Less standing in front of a closet wondering who I am today.
I don't just plan my day the night before. Confession: I draft a daily plan for every day of the upcoming month, then quietly refresh it the night before, like a hotel turndown service for my future self.
This is not new behaviour.
Recently, at a pirate Santa party, I found myself in a spirited back-and-forth tussle over a set of colour-coded daily vitamin boxes. Spirited meaning I was defending them with my life.
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For a long time, I thought all of this was about efficiency. About Not. Wasting. Time. About squeezing the most possible life out of every day.
But I've realized, gently and a little late, that it's not really about time at all.
It's about decision fatigue.
It's about not wanting to wake up and immediately start negotiating with myself. What to wear. What to eat. When to work. Whether this is the right day to start the thing. Whether I should wait until tomorrow, which will obviously be better, calmer, more organized, and emotionally prepared.
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I once had a friend tell me he doesn't pre-plan his day. "I just let it come as it comes," he said, cheerfully.
My immediate thought was: God, that must be exhausting.
Not because it's wrong. Not because he's doing life incorrectly. But because for some of us, the sheer volume of tiny decisions is the thing that drains us dry before noon.
I'm recognizing that planning isn't my way of controlling life. It's my way of clearing space inside it.
When I've already decided what matters, I'm freer to be present. Kinder. More creative. Less irritable. Slightly more fun to be around. The planning does the heavy lifting so I don't have to.
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This is not a prescription. I am not here to convert the spontaneous. I admire you. From a safe distance.
But I am learning to be a little more honest about why I do what I do. Not because it makes me better, but because it makes me calmer. And calmer, it turns out, is where my better qualities live.
Even if it does involve colour-coded vitamins.
~ Danielle
The Midlife Syllabus
Lesson #12
Maybe freedom is just fewer decisions.
Beauty, Grace & Daily Artistry
A small, imperfect pleasure:
Opening a planner I've already filled out and feeling like someone has my back.
What I'm Reading, Watching, or Listening to
Watching
All five Pirates of the Caribbean movies.
Sam is recovering from surgery, and who knew that a whole lot of Johnny Depp in eyeliner would be just what was needed.
This Week on the Blog
A piece on the day I almost moved to Italy.